Quote of the Day

I, the fiery life of divine essence, am aflame beyond the beauty of the meadows,

I gleam in the waters, and I burn in the sun, moon, and stars....I awaken everything to life.

-Hildergard of Bingen -

Temperance Reform Clubs

Air — "Perhaps"

Some enterprising people,

In our cities and towns,

Have gone to organizing clubs

Of men that's fallen down;

In estimation fallen low —

Now they may rise again,

And be respected citizens

Throughout our native land.

CHORUS:

The temperance reform club,

Forever may it stand,

And everyone that loves strong drink

Pray, join it heart and hand.

Then many a home will be bright,

And many a heart made glad,

It will be the greatest blessing

This nation ever had.

Manufacturers of strong drink

Can find better employ,

Than bring to ruin poor families,

And thousand souls destroy,

Likewise proprietors of saloons

Lose many a customer;

Those men now rather stay at home,

That place they now prefer.

Chorus —

Don't be ashamed to wear your badge

Of ribbon on your breast,

It shows you've joined the club to be

A man among the rest.

Your kindred friends will love to see

You honored, sober man,

And all the friends that wish you well

Will help you if they can.

Chorus —

Perhaps you have a mother,

Likewise a sister, too;

Perhaps you have a sweetheart

That thinks the most of you.

Perhaps you have a loving wife,

And little ones at home,

Their hearts rejoice to see that you

Can let strong drink alone.

Chorus —

Many a man joined the club

That never drank a drachm,

Those noble men were kind and brave

They care not for the slang —

The slang they meet on every side:

"You're a reform drunkard, too;

You've joined the red ribbon brigade,

Among the drunkard crew."

Chorus —

It shows their hearts were very kind,

They wish to save poor souls

That loved the intoxication cup,

That signed the temperance roll.

Dear friends, ever keep rolling

The work you have begun,

Those noble men will not repent,

I hope, throughout our land.

Chorus —

Dr. Reynolds is a noble man,

He has worked hard to save

Some people in our cities and towns,

From out a drunkard's grave.

There is other men to help him now,

He lectures not alone

Many a heart that blesses them

From out now happy homes.

Julia A Moore

Today's Quote

I do not consider divorce an evil by any means. It is just as much a refuge for women married to brutal men as Canada was to the slaves of brutal masters.

Susan B. Anthony

Portrait of a Batterer

Several years ago, as a counselor working with parolees, I was asked to run a group, not for the victims, but for the batterers.  Most of the men, and one woman, in my group would not stand out in a crowd.  No one would know for they hid it well.  All were extremely charming, and all denied that they were guilty of anything.  Some complained that it had happened years ago, and why should it have to follow them through life?  One, especially stood out.

He'd once been a fairly wealthy man, a business executive who'd amassed a small fortune for himself, his wife, and his teen-daughters.  All seemed perfect in their lives, but he was a very 'cold' and 'unloving' man.  Eventually, the night came when his wife asked for a divorce.  At first, he did not respond.  He waited until she was in bed, and then he went into the bedroom and beat her in the head with a barbell...his teen-age daughters watching in horror.  

He was arrested, convicted, and imprisoned. His wife survived and had endure several operations.  Eventually the court awarded her his entire fortune.  What I saw in group was a man who lacked any sort of remorse whatsoever, a true sociopath.  In fact, he blamed her for what happened every chance he got and on several occasions expressed his anger that 'that bitch got all my money.'  Listening to him made my skin crawl. 

This is quite common in relationships ravished by domestic violence. The typical batterer refuses to be responsible for their violent actions or for the harm they cause. They learn to deny  responsibility for their behaviors , minimize injury, and  project blame onto the victim . I've found that may often deny that the abuse occurred or minimize the impact of their assaultive behavior.  "She hit me first.  What was I supposed to do?" announced a 250 pound man who beat his wife so severely that she has lost sight in her left eye.  "I just shoved her a little.  It's not my fault that she slipped and hit her head."  "It's all her fault.  She knows not to pick at me when I've been drinking."

Batterers are notorious for making the family afraid by using actions and gestures.  They smash things, destroy the victim's property, may abuse pets, children, and even display weapons.  Making family members feel bad about themselves is a prime form of emotional abuse.  The victims, when they are not being physically beaten down, are humiliated by name calling, mind games, and being made to feel ashamed or guilty. The following are some other characteristics to look for:

--A batterer will often blow up in anger over the smallest of incidents. They take everything personally and are easily insulted, claiming hurt feelings as an excusewhen very angry.

--A batterer is usually excessively jealous.  When the relationship is just getting off the ground, the batter may claim that jealousy is a sign of his or her love. The truth is, jealousy has nothing to do with love. It comes from the batterer's low self-esteem and insecurities.

--The batterer is often a drug or alcohol abuser...although neither are the cause of the violence per se.

--The batterer will often make verbal threats such as, "Keep it up and I'll smack your face" or "I’ll kill you".  They rationalize this by saying  "Everybody talks like that". And they probably DO believe this because most batterers grew up emulating an abusive father.

--The batterer is moody and unpredictable, nice one moment and explosive the next.  

--The batterer will discourage your relationships with family and friends in an effort to isolate the victim. 

--The batterer will usually control all of the finances and force the victim to account for whatever they spend.

The Prayer of Women

O spirit that broods upon the hills

And moves upon the face of the deep,

And is heard in the wind,

Save us from the desire of men's eyes,

And the cruel lust of them.

Save us from the springing of the cruel seed

In that narrow house which is as the grave

For darkness and loneliness . . .

That women carry with them with shame, and weariness,

and long pain,

Only for the laughter of man's heart,

And for the joy that triumphs therein,

And the sport that is in his heart,

Wherewith he mocketh us,

Wherewith he playeth with us,

Wherewith he trampleth upon us . . .

Us, who conceive and bear him;

Us, who bring him forth;

Who feed him in the womb, and at the breast, and

at the knee:

Whom he calleth mother and wife,

And mother again of his children and his children's

children.

Ah, hour of the hours,

When he looks at our hair and sees it is grey;

And at our eyes and sees they are dim;

And at our lips straightened out with long pain;

And at our breasts, fallen and seared as a barren hill;

And at our hands, worn with toil !

Ah, hour of the hours,

When, seeing, he seeth all the bitter ruin and wreck of us--

All save the violated womb that curses him --

All save the heart that forbeareth . . . for pity --

All save the living brain that condemneth him --

All save the spirit that shall not mate with him --

All save the soul he shall never see

Till he be orfe with it, and equal;

He who hath the bridle, but guideth not;

He who hath the whip, yet is driven;

He who as a shepherd calleth upon us,

But is himself a lost sheep, crying among the hills!

O Spirit, and the Nine Angels who watch us,

And Thou, white Christ, and Mary Mother of Sorrow,

Heal us of the wrong of man:

We whose breasts are weary with milk,

Cry, cry to Thee, O Compassionate!

--Fiona Macleod--

Quote of the Day

You gain strength, courage, and confidence by every experience

in which you really stop to look fear in the face.

You must do the thing which you think you cannot do.

-- Eleanor Roosevelt --

Be Thankful

Be thankful that you don't already have everything you desire.
If you did, what would there be to look forward to?
Be thankful when you don't know something,
for it gives you the opportunity to learn.

Be thankful for the difficult times.
During those times you grow.
Be thankful for your limitations,
because they give you opportunities for improvement.
Be thankful for each new challenge,
because it will build your strength and character.

Be thankful for your mistakes. They will teach you valuable lessons.
Be thankful when you're tired and weary,
because it means you've made a difference.

It's easy to be thankful for the good things.
A life of rich fulfillment comes to those who are also thankful for the setbacks.
Gratitude can turn a negative into a positive.
Find a way to be thankful for your troubles,
and they can become your blessings.

Author Unknown

The Oyster

There once was an oyster

Whose story I tell,

Who found that some sand

Had got into his shell.

It was only a grain,

but it gave him great pain.

For oysters have feelings

Although they're so plain.

Now, did he berate

the harsh workings of fate

That had brought him

To such a deplorable state?

Did he curse at the government,

Cry for election,

And claim that the sea should

Have given him protection?

"No,' he said to himself

As he lay on a shell,

Since I cannot remove it,

I shall try to improve it.

Now the years have rolled around,

As the years always do,

And he came to his ultimate

Destiny stew.

And the small grain of sand

That had bothered him so

Was a beautiful pearl

All richly aglow.

Now the tale has a moral,

for isn't it grand

What an oyster can do

With a morsel of sand?

What couldn't we do

If we'd only begin

With some of the things

That get under our skin.

Author Unknown

Ecclesiastes 3:1-8

Take Time:

Take time to think-

It is the source of all power.

Take time to read-

It is the fountain of wisdom.

Take time to play-

It is the source of perpetual youth.

Take time to be quiet-

It is the opportunity to seek God.

Take time to be aware-

It is the opportunity to help others.

Take time to love and be loved-

It is God’s greatest gift.

Take time to laugh-

It is the music of the soul.

Take time to be friendly-

It is the road to happiness.

Take time to dream-

It is what the future is made of.

Take time to pray-

It is the greatest power on earth.

Today's Quote

Women have always been the strong ones of the world. The men are always seeking from women a little pillow to put their heads down on. They are always longing for the mother who held them as infants.

Coco Chanel

(Isn't she spectacular?)

Today's Quote

Human trafficking is a growing reality in the United States and the Senate's action is an important step in fighting it. This new law not only strengthens the current trafficking law, it also grants additional funds to help prosecute sex trafficking offenders and offers protection to victims of this heinous crime.

Janice Crouse

Today's Quote

The women of the country have the power in their own hands, in spite of the law and the government being altogether of the male order.

Victoria Woodhull

Be Good To You

Be yourself... truthfully.

Accept yourself... gratefully.

Value yourself... completely.

Treat Yourself... generously.

Balance Yourself... harmoniously.

Bless Yourself... abundantly.

Trust Yourself... confidently.

Love Yourself... wholeheartedly.

Empower Yourself... prayerfully.

Give Yourself... enthusiastically.

Express Yourself... radiantly.

Honor Yourself... purposefully.

-- Author Unknown--